7 posts tagged “love”
"...we have to hang the curtains as soon as possible...."
Oh shit, here it comes. My eyes are burning! Don't blink, don't blink, maybe it'll reabsorb.
"...because if we don't do it immediately it'll never get done and..."
Oh crap, I blinked. There go the waterworks.
"..Honey? What's wrong? Did you get something in your eye?"
I tried with the "yes, it's probably just a grain of sand. In both of them", but that didn't fly. We just sat in the car, him going on about the curtains and us talking about the move, and all of a sudden it just hit me that pretty soon he won't be talking curtains with me for two months. Now, I know people go to war and don't see each other for years, but two months is big for me. I hadn't actually thought about the him-not-being-there-factor. Of course I knew right from the start that I'd miss him when he's gone, but I kinda pushed it aside because I was so thrilled for him (and for visiting Paradise myself, too), but right there in the car it hit me. And I felt so selfish for crying about it. I know it's all part of his job to be mobile, and it's just two months. But still. It helps a lot to know we are both important to each other, but there are still moments when it hits me. The times he's physically already gone for a mission I can deal with, that's just a lot of waiting. But the realizations, the moments when all you can think of is that he'll soon be gone, and that the moment is speeding up to catch us once again really suck. But, I can't really complain. He always comes back.
The worst thing of it all will be explaining the situation to my parents. They just asked me a few weeks ago how I'll feel being alone in our new flat, and I told them I won't be alone. Sami won't have to go to another country until next spring. Two days later Paradise calls and everything changes. I wouldn't wanna explain this to my parents because I know they're worrying about me, and I know a lot of what I'm doing right now doesn't seem like it makes much sense. So I always end up feeling like I have to explain everything, like I still have to answer to them about the decisions I make concerning my life.
That always feels weird since I do feel like I've finally arrived to where my life has more or less driven me. I'm in a constant state of complicated bliss. And I'm constantyl having to explain things I do to someon who doesn't really get it at all. Be it friends who don't want me moving, bosses who tell me they wouldn't want to let me go, relatives I'll miss or my immediate family who are obviously sick with worry about me. It's flattering in some way (because Lord knows I love them all), choking in another, but the worst part is that if I feel like things are bad (which I will come autumn, I always get a little depressed when the days get shorter) I can't say it out loud because there'll be "I told you so":s shooting at me from all directions.
Maybe I should just be constantly sedated or drunk from September first to October last.
Paradise on Earth called again. The whole thing was supposed to be on hold until next fall, but seems they need people right now. They wanted to pay hideous amounts of money, free food, housing and flights to and from the location. They need one pair of guys, and some of Sami's co-workers are engaged otherwise, one is becoming a dad and there's just all kinds of stuff going on with all of the guys at that particular time. Seems the only 2 guys who are actually available at that time would be Sami and one other guy. So they will be leaving shortly to spend a few months working in Paradise.
I will of course miss him, but I can't even think about that right now because I'm so excited about it all! It's such a great opportunity for him, and I know I would love a similar chance to do something that really drives me. It's good for his career, for our financial situation and it's sooooo exciting. And I get a chance to go visit him at the end of their stay. Sami did invite me to come with him for all the time he would be working, but my thesis and german classes won't allow me to travel for a few months.
All in all it seems the travelling is starting to bother me less and less. I still miss him when he's away (of course), but I realize it's a part of his work he'll never get out of. As long as the countries, locations and areas are peaceful I can cope with it. As long as there is trust and a genuine knowledge of the importance of the significant other in both of us, we're okay.
Other than that, there has been a lot of travelling lately. My brother is in the military, the parental unit is in beautiful Greece. And I have the day off. I spent a lot of it at the beach and felt really relaxed. Tomorrow there'll be a little more action though. We will have to go shopping for stuff for our new apartment!
We got the apartment! It's ours! To rent, I mean. But anyway! This loveliness of 73 square m, and our very own petite backyard is situated in Upinniemi. You're all always welcome to Our Home. Just notify us at least 1hr in advance so the guards at the gate will let you in. All you foreigners coming by, for you it's 2 weeks in advance for a security check-up. So hereby everybody is always welcome to this seaside beauty at the outskirts of my new hometown. I'm already looking foreward to spending a lot of time with my cousin Laura and the ever so lovely Annika. Since I'm counting on her coming to her senses and moving to Helsinki. Move, move, move! I'll still be coming to Turku every week, because I still have to pfysically attend the classes I'm taking. Lots f moving around, and for the first time ever, I'm really enjoying my new found sense of mobility.
OK, so Sami's going to be the bestman in a wedding in August. Both the bride and groom are very close friends of his, and as you will remember when you read on, I like them too. I already participated in the brides' bachelorette party, as I am the girlfriend of the bestman. I was a bit uncomfortable about the whole hen-night since I don't know everybody else, or the bride for that matter, from my childhood. I knew noone but the bride, and her from about a year back. All in all it was still a fun party. Which we all paid 60e for. And that's nothing, I was prepared to cough up the dough for that one.
Sami has, as you might guess, spent a lot of time arranging the grooms' bachelor party, and that has been the source of a few arguments. During May and June, he was away at work a lot and the days he was at home went by arranging the bachelor party. I know that has to be done, I just don't like it.
Apparently, the bridesmaid and bestman are also free labour. As am I. I have been told it's understood without asking that the bridesmaid and bestman clean up everything after the wedding all by their lonesome. Cleaning up after 100 drunk people while you yourself are incredibly hung over always sounds great. And even this I was going to be a good sport about and not whine (even if I think it sucks. Hire a cleaning service.)
But here comes the money shot. I am apparently expected to wake up somewhere completely else than my home on the day of the wedding! The bride and groom think it would be nice to follow the tradition of waking up in different households the morning of their wedding. They also think it would be a nice tradition that the groom and the bestman get to spend a few morning-hours together discussing the whole festive ordeal. And they thought it would be nice if the groom could spend his last bachelor night at the house of the bestman.The bride, however, thinks it would not be that nice if there were women in the household. Be it the bestman's girlfriend or not. Neither of them have actually discussed this with us.Right about now I think it would be a good time to remind you, I also like the bride and groom, they're nice people, I just think they're a little wedding-nuts. The groom mentioned he might spend the night in a sentence buried somewhere deep in a completely non-related discussion. Noone has asked me. Sami tried to talk about it but quickle gave up when he spotted my attitude towards all of this.
Where the fuck do they come off demanding I leave my house because it doesn't suit their plans that I wake up in my own bed? What the hell?! Are they afraid I'm going to make a pass at the groom right under the eyes of my own boyfriend? Are they afraid I'm so goddamn hot that the groom just can't control himself and wants to call the wedding off? Are they afraid I might see the groom in his pajamas?
WHAT?!
And why in the world am I being difficult if I don't want to drag tons of make-up, all my clothes, shoes, accessories, shower stuff and blow drier to Sami's parents house and interrupt their peaceful day by taking over the bathroom? I just don't get why they won't ask either of us, straight to our face if this kind of arrangement would be okay, and why it seems that it would be unappropriate to demand the right to stay in my own goddamn home!
Please, comment me with views and opinions. Am I just being unreasonable on their big day?
So, we didn't sleep in the same bed. Sami slept part of the night on the couch.
I had gone to sleep earlier because I was about to die standing up. We had discussed something and a second later I fell asleep. In the morning I learned my darling man had slept on the couch because of me. He had asked me to move aside about a second after I fell asleep. Because we had discussed something a second earlier, he thought I was still awake. Now, for those who don't know, I can fall asleep if I blink too slowly, and it takes a lot more than unconsciousness to stop me from talking. So, for whatever reason, I started sleep-mumbling. And wouldn't you know it, I mumbled a "no" as an answer to his question.
Sami: so you don't want me to come to sleep here, by your side?
Why on earth he would doubt my willingness to sleep next to him so much that he had to ask, I will never know.
And in my sleep,I mumbled another "no".
Sami: Honey, I'm asking you seriously, don't you want to move over and let me sleep here? Don't you wanna sleep next to me?
My stupid sleeptalking soul mumbled yet again "no" (!!!)
So, he headed for the couch, slept there for about an hour and a half, and came to bed when I had, in my sleep, rolled over. Oh dear. And in the morning when I found out I wouldn't let him get into his own bed, you can imagine how I felt. And him knowing that I sleepwalk, sleeptalk, sing, and cause minor household-related wateraccidents that make you wanna check your homeinsurance, should've known better than to believe my mumbling. Especially since everything is fine, I can't remember when the last time we argued was. So we agreed on him never asking, just giving me a swift kick in the side and a shove and conquering a space of his own.
Poor guy. I really do feel horrible about my sleeping inner bastard.
Jumping to another issue, we wen't looking at a few apartments yesterday.One was very nice, but a little small.We could've easily fit allof our furniture, clothes, millions of my shoes and all the sofas in there. But. Not the tons of books I own, or the couple hundred DVDs Sami owns and love probably a lot more than me. So, off to the next one we go!
It sounded good enough. Renovated, large, only 5 km from the centre of town, 500 m to the beach, affordable. Ok, so they may have left a few things out of the ad. Like that it was over 6 km from town. Like you couldn't see the beach because there was a solid 500m of thick wood in front of it. And oh, like the small fact that the apartmentbuilding was in the middle of the goddamn woods!
It was, as I said, first of all impossible to see the beach, so there goes the "beach view". Unless you have x-ray vision. commuting would include walking 1km to the closest bus-stop. Now I can hear all the Finns going "1 km isn't too much!", and they're right. It's not too much in the summer. In the winter, in -30 degrees Celsius or in the fall, in rain that drenches the soul, It's way too much. And it's right by the freeway so you can count on all the cars spraying you with mud and snow. 5-6 km to the closest shop. And civilization. Because, seriously, there was just nothing but woods for 6 straight kilometres. That was a little too much. The apartment was lovely though, but nothing's THAT nice.
We have, actually, been looking at an apartment we're dreaming of renting and probably will eventually rent. It has an ocean view and is in a nice neighbourhood. A swimming hall and a gym very close by. The apartment is big, and we can choose between one with a mini-yard or one without. It's cheap, comparing to anything else we've looked at. Really cheap, and there's nothing wrong with it. All the caretaking facilities are very close by if something would occur. Now, it is 9-10 km from the town, and thus equally far from the closest shop. But! It has a well equipped cafe very close by, where you can get everything you might need in the middle of the night or on a sunday. And, even though it's farther away from the town than the last apartmen we looked at, it would have civilization and people along all of the 9-10 km it takes to get there. Buses run several times every day, from practically outside the door so it wouldn't be a problem to get to the shops or even just out of there if you want to. And finally, lots and lots of people live there, so you don't feel like you're out in the middle of goddamn nowhere.
It's even in a location most of you know, but I'm not confessing to anything until I've talked to my family and everything is confirmed.
As you can see from the first pic, our midsummer started a bit unorthodox. We were going to spend midsummer with Sami's parents and realatives at this island about 1 km off the coast. They went to the island a day before us since they got off work so early, and we were going to meet them there bu friday morning. They offered to pick us up in a little rubber boat, but Sami thought it would be more fun to swim to the island. I was up for the challenge and off we were! What you see here is us in drysuits and water-resistant backpacks (I believe they were called dui-packs, don't know why, probably the brand or something..). Under the suits we are wearing long underwear and a cotton uniform to keep us warm. Since the material the drysuit is made of doesnt store any heat, and you don't have any air between yourself and the suit to keep you warm. It felt kind of funny because ok, we were able to keep our bodies warm, but the idea is to get all the air out of the suit so you can swim around in it instead of just bobbing around like a ducktoy. The water squeezed surprisingly much, but it didn't feel uncomfortable at all. Except for when the waves were hitting us in the neck and the back of the head. Man that felt nasty, because the finnish archipelago isn't as warm in its water as most of the archipelagos out there.
After we got to the island, we went canooeing (is that a word?) . Paddling on a canoo. You know what I mean.
Then it was time for the real action, diving! On with the suits again. Long underwear, Teddysuit (because it's warm and fluffy) socks, wool socks, drysuit (which, by the way, is like pulling a condom on your head), diving socks of neoprene (or whatever, all the divers know better than me), diving gloves, mask, snorkel, lead belt (because you can't get to the bottom just by your own bodyweight), flippers, and finally, the huge canister of air and a bcd (Buoyancy Control Device, that's the vest I'm wearing, Mom) and you're good to go. Before you get to the water it's pain. You're sweating, you wheigh a ton, you're just very very uncomfortable. But once you hit the water it's really nice. You forget all the device on you and concentrate on the task at hand. And as you can see from the picture, the only part of my body that can possibly get cold is my lips. So I survived. Sami had a mask that covered all pf his face because he's considerably more pro than I am. This was only my second dive in open water. So we were attached to each other by ropes and had the buoy so we wouldn't get hit by any boats, and so that we could be found in case anything happened. Nothing happened Mom.
So off we were, me firmly holding on to Sami's hand so he just wouldn't lose me. You really can't see that much since the Gulf of Finland is so polluted, but the place we were was sandbottom (instead of the usual mud) so we could see about 4m straight ahead. Of course I was only looking down because there was so much interesting stuff going on at the bottom. Actually nothing happened but the bottom looks a lot different up close and moving than it does from the surface. All the algae is actually very pretty. And thanks to my sharp concentration on the sand, we found treasure! Just the prettiest rusty propeller I've ever seen. It had probably laid in the sand for a number of years but we took it with us. And as Sami later informed me, the propeller is obviously quite a bit of treasure to find in these waters. A very successful dive all in all.
After that, we headed for the sauna and started with the real midsummer-activity; partying. And no, I'm not sad or tired on the picture, that's just what I look like without make-up. But as long as I was holding the bottle of bubbly, I didn't care. We had a lot of fun and it was a beautiful, warm nightless night (the land of the midnigt sun, you all know?), good company and just lots of fun.
The morning after Sami didn't have that much fun. He was incredibly hungover. I had wen't to sleep a little earlier than him because, quite frankly, all the swimming, paddling and diving exhausted me. He had gone to sleep a lot later and even then only after his aunt practically forced him (no no I won't go, I'm a big boy now). He actually woke me and his sister up because he started laughing so hard. All the boeat was snoring so loud (not me!) and when you're drunk, that's pretty funny. In the morning, he wasn't laughing. Me on the other side, I was jsut dandy. So me and Sanna went sunbathing. I hadn't looked in a mirror in a few days, and nobody informed me my face was already read as a boiled lobster. So instead och getting a suntan, mu face got a sunburn. Good times anyway. We came back home in the afternoon, Sami's cousin offered us a ride back to the opposite shore (from where we took a walk, a bus and a tube home), but the engine died in the right in the middle. So Sami got to paddle us to the shore. Mikko, the cousin didn't get the engine running on his way back, so we saw him grabbing the oars and start to paddle. Then we saw the oars break in two and fall in the drink. After that Mikko jumped in to save his oars but he was still in a pickle with no working engine and no oars smack in the middle of the sea. So we called the relatives on the island and told them to pick him up. These people are obviously not the lifeguards we hoped they would be. It took us another phone call and a good 10 minutes before we saw another little boat depart from the island. Still, Mikko got back safe, although a little pissed, and we got home.
The next morning I woke up with a cold and an all red, burning face, but all in all it was a great midsummer. Plus, I got a few (or more) beers and a kiss:
Since I'm on my way to move in with Sami, I think it would be time for you guys to really learn to know some more or less interesting things about him. These are all small things and just a fraction of why I love him (yes, mom, love him, will marry him later on) but they tell something about what kind of person Sami is. So here goes.
Sami:
Is obviously very handsome and fit.
Has a fantastic sense of humor.
Puts the lid down on the toilet seat.
Carries me over puddles of water.
With one hand.
I weigh 60 kg.
Is fair
Never loses his nerve, no matter how difficult I am.
Is calm and patient
Does all the things he puts his mind to
Runs marathons (I really respect that).
Is genuinely happy about other peoples accomplishments.
Has a black belt (and then some) in karate.
Rides a motorcycle.
Dives.
Skydives. Not so much these days but you still get the picture.
Cooks. Not often, but oh man when he does!
Never nags
Jogs with me even though I'm not even close to being in marathon-running shape.
Is always interested in learning new things.
Is 1 cm shorter than me, and not bothered.
Bench-presses over 120kg.
Is extremly talented on rollerblades. Jumps, spins, twirls, the works.
Loves movies.
Is dyslexic.
But still reads heaps of books.
Doesn't like to go clothes-shopping, but spends hours in the outdoors-section.
Actually means what he says.
Says beautiful things.
Is always there. For anyone. At any time of the day. If you need help, you usually don't even have to call.
Loves my mom's food.
And my dads BBQ-stuff.
Loves his job. I've never met anyone before this who does.
Never, ever whines. He just bows his head and gets on with whatever need to be done.
Is a very, very giving person. In every sense.
Suffers from a constant positive mood.
Is considerate. He actually buys beer-appropriate food sometimes,like tortillas or chicken wings because he knows I enjoy the occasional beer. Or five.
Loves buying presents.
Enjoys trying new things. The diving/skydiving probably already said it...
So. There you have it. A little about the man of my dreams. I could probably add a lot of stuff, but that says something about the man I intend to spend the better half of my life with. Unless he dumps me. Hope not...
Oh man, renting's just a peach. We've been looking at a few flats for next fall, and so I contacted the real-estate agent that was supposed to be in charge of a few pretty little rentable apartments.
Me: "Hi! I'm calling about Gorgeous Flat in Beautiful Place, we'd like to arrange a showing of the flat?"
Real-estate agent: "I'm going on holiday today and we don't have any new showings on that particular apartment. Why did you actuall call?"
Me: "Umm.. cuz your ad on the net says "call and arrange for a showing"..."
REA: "Oh yeah, but as I said, I'm going on vacation and I don't know who's handling those apartments while I'm gone, but you should check our website because we'll be posting a new date for a showing as soon as one is figured out"
Me: "Okay, but you see, my problem is that we both work pretty long hours, and my boyfriend sometimes has to travel because of his job. Isn't there any way we could arrange a showing of The Flat?"
REA: "Sorry, but you could always sign in on our website, and leave a message with the address of the apartment, and we'll sign you in as a rentseeker for it. That way you don't have to worry about not beeing able to come to the showing!"
Yeah, that's just what I wanna do, rent an apartment I've never seen. Stupid fucker real-estate guy.
On another note, I went to a job interview. I'm only going to be able to work for a 2-3 days/week max next fall, since I'll be traveling to my hometown to do my thesis and study a little german. So I applied for a job at a pharmacy in the town we're planning on moving to. I went to the interview, told them about myself, my good and bad sides, studies and life (they asked).
Potentiel Future Boss: "Okay, so you're planning on moving here next fall, when is that exactly? Do you have an apartment already?"
And so I explained a little about our troubles to even get to come look at a damn place to live.
POB: "Okay, so here's the deal. You are the best candidate I've interviewed (Yay!), I like you (whopee) and would like to hire you (jackpot!). We could offer you a place to live as part of your salary".
Me: "You do realise I won't be able to work for you more than monday, friday and potentially saturday?"
POB: "Uhhuh, and we don't want more. Actually we're not even sure about fridays. We would like you to work wednesdays, but you going back and forth to your hometown and this place every other day when you can do it once a week is just stupid. And once you german course is finished bu christmas, we'd like for you to work monday, tuesday and wednesday. That way you have the rest of the week to write your thesis. Now, what kind of pay did you have in mind?"
Me telling her, us discussing the thing. They might not meet my request for the pay but it doesn't matter because I'd still get enough to pay for the tax-value of the potential apartment (it just works that way, the value of the flat is added to the pay and then subtracted from total taxes.) and feed myself. They whipped out the contract and wanted me to sign rightaway, but I told them I'd get back to them in a few days. Mainly because I was already dialing my dads number in my head. I just had to ask him if the deal is kosher, and he's an expert on these kinds of things. He's actually somewhat an expert on everything even remotely related to finances. The contract would mean we'd probably have to move out of the flat they'd arrange for us within a year, as I'm planning to graduate, and then it's bye bye pharmacywork, but I don't mind. We were thinking about renting for a year or two anyway because we're trying to save up the cash to qualify for a loan. And because the rent would be cheaper in that place we'd have a pretty good chance of saving up a lot more than if we'd rent "the old fashioned way". I'm probably gonna take the job.
And while we're on the topic of working, I did that this weekend too. Me and another promo-girl sold vodka-redbulls in a bar saturday night. It was a lot of fun and we made a shitload lot of money for the Redbull. The funny thing was that there were a lot of Estonians there. Skinny guys and a few 50-60 year-old geezers, and boy can they handle their liquour!
Okay, finns drink, but these guys, wow! They came for "one more" about a gazillion times, and these were pretty heavy shots we sold. It was a very good deal and apparently the Estonians also thought so. They drank drink after drink after drink, and it was barely noticeable! People heavier, taller and generally bigger were drunk as hell with half the amount of drinks, but these guys just kept on going. They weren't even drunk enough to dance, although one of them played a little poker. About half an hour before we closed our little promo we caught one of them smiling exceptionally much, but not one was even walking funny. And the 50 year-old geezer they had with them had been nestling vodkas, beers, and whatever alcohol for 6 hours straight, and still: nothing! It was just incredible. Way to handle your booze Estonia!
