59 posts tagged “sami”
I had the stitches removed 4 days back. By a certified nurse, at the closest health-center.
Yesterday, when I removed the Steri-Strips that I was supposed to cover the wound with for an additonal 3-4 days, I had a surprise waiting for me. 2 suspicios shadows inside my knee. So I picked the healed skin apart with a needle and took out 2 ADDITONAL LOOPS OF STRING! Goddamn!
Yes, I am that crazy of a bitch, and soon I'll be a crazy bitch with an amputated knee because of the nice little infection I probably gave myself while poking around.
But come the fuck on. I know it might be hard to tell bright blue surgical string apart from my black blood, but that was just ridiculous. How do you miss 2 complete loops of blue stitching? Huh? Found that nursing degree in our box of cereal this morning, did we?
Apart from this little "Honey, you might wanna come over here and check this the hell out"-incident, it's been peachy. It always takes a while when he comes back from these long trips abroad, and I suppose it hasn't been easy on him either. All the ex-pats in the organization where he works have it pretty well when they are abroad. Chef and all. So when I promised to make lunch for both him and Tapsa during their first day back, and took them to the supermarket, they were standing in the meat-section as bewildered as 2 bunnies on the highway. Sami was the first to recover in the produce-section.
"We need stuff from here too?"
"Well, yeah."
"Okay. Run free, woman. Do your thing"
So for me it's been lots of fun. The most fun part was watching him mop the floors. After which we finally saw the first Narnia-movie. I can hear y'all going wooooot? but remember I'm not big on fantasy and still haven't seen the last 2 LOTR-movies sober. It was okay, I suppose, but I have to say this much: the 2 boys, Edmund and Peter, you know? I completely get why they were so far back in the closet.
I totally forgot to tell you guys what a complete idiot I was at the bridal shop a few days ago!
So, my dress came, right? And we went to try it on, right? And the other color in this story is the lady at the bridal shop, right?
"So where are your shoes?"
"um... at home... 160km away..."
"Why didn't you bring them with you?"
"I didn't know I was supposed to" (yeah, I know, I know, but somehow I imagined the dress is one size and that's it. Either it's the proper length or then its tough shit for the bride. Apparently not)
"Do you think you'd be able to recognize the shoes you bought?"
"yeah. Those, over there"
"Good. Did you bring your lingerie with you?"
"um... no."
*sigh*
"Okay. What kind of lingerie do you have?"
"um... none. I thought I'd go out and buy them sometime after this dress came."
"Allright. But be sure to buy them and bring them with you to the next fitting."
"There's one more?!"
"Yeah! We have to take it in, right?"
"Oh. I thought this was it."
"And then there's a final fitting after that."
"Are you kidding me?"
That woman had the patience of a saint and I should totally send her flowers. And vodka.
But how am I supposed to know these things? I thought I try the dress on and go buy bras after that, and I honestly thought they were a standard length and stuff. I swear to God, if anyone of my friends ever gets married I'm making them a rulebook about these things. And I only get how embarrassing I am after I blurt things out in the air.
And a while ago Sami called. Since my stitches should be removed the day after they come home, and there's no way I'm traveling to Turku on the day he arrives home, we talked about if Tapsa could do it because he has received the proper medical training. Sami told me we wouldn't have to get the scalpel you normally use for these things because scissors would work equally well. After I painted him a vivid scenario of what would happen if anyone tried to come at me with kitchen utencils and a pitchfork, he sighed "I knew I shouldn't have told you in advance."
...because I probably couldn't tell the difference between pliers and a scalpel anyway.
I was soooooo nervous.
My morning began with me waking up to the bass of Joni's music at about 6ish. Since I rarely sleep over at my parents house anymore, I think he didn't come to think of how INSANE BASS might wake me in the room next to his. And I guess I have grown to be somewhat of an adult too, because instead of running around in circles in his room, screaming "GAAAAAAAAAH!" and choking him to illustrate my point, I waited for a moment if it would stop, and when it didn't, I asked him to "please turn that shit off because the bass goes all the way through the house". Joni, also apparently having hit adulthood, aswered: "okay. But please don't call it shit".
Me, ever the lady, restrained the animal in me that wanted to run inside his room, gather all technological instruments remotely related to music, carry them to the backyard and hit them with large sticks, and gave him an "mmh." So the first good thing this morning was that I got an encouraging text message from one of my friends, which was very thoughtful of her and incredibly nice for me. Even if she technically did wish the nurses luck in handling me.
From there on it didn't go so well either. I went to the hospital, and they loaded me up with diazepam, which didn't calm me down at all because the thought of needles makes my brain curl up in a corner and reach for its stuffed bear. The IV-drip, not nice either, but from there on it was smooth sailing. The anesthesiologist came, introduced himself, and when I countered with "Hi, I'm terrified. I mean Jenni", inserted 3 milliliters of what was probably sunshine, glitter and my little pony combined. I remember him giving me a spinal, which was nice, because at that point, everything was nice. I have never before experienced InstaDrunk (because that is what they should call it, no matter what it is called now), but I laughed all the way to the OR. And when I discovered that I was laughing for no apparent reason, I started laughing at my laughter. Noticing the nurse, I thought it would be important to let her know that I was not laughing at her, but at the mere thought of laughter.
"I think I might be a bit high"
"Oh honey, as a kite."
Everything went well, and I have a little less tendon in my knee to bug me at night, they flushed the knee with whatever you use to flush these things, and it isn't even sore. Yet.
And this evening Sami called:
"I just wanted to wish you good luck to your operation tomorrow!"
"Yeah... thanks... I had it this morning"
"Crap."
"...so how are you doing? Anxious to come home yet?"
"Yeah, although after a few months of work we are in desperate need for relaxation. We thought we'd start drinking immediately when we get to Finland but we haven't figured out a way to get booze to the airport in the middle of the night."
"Are you serious?"
"well.. yeah!"
"You've been gone for months now and if you come home in the middle of the night, smelling like ass and completely shitfaced, I am going to change the goddamn locks on this goddamn house and return the goddamn engagement ring! And cuz I'm still on crutches and can't drive you need to be sober so we can go shop for food on the next day!"
"uhuh? How about if we get a driver? Or come in a taxi?"
Either this is tough, or I'm a big wuss.
First, there's this feeling that everything sucks. I'm lonely and he isn't coming home for ages. That's a little hump, and I need to get over it.
And I do.
I parade on to the next adventure, and that's when it hits me. Just around the corner is another hump. A big one.
This is the one I'm not prepared for.
Everything sucks. It sucks hard and it doesn't even suck well. It rains all the time. I meet with friends but everything still sucks. I'm blue all the time. I start to imagine him being home so much that I can almost feel it. I talk to him online and all he needs to say is "g'night starlet" and tears fill my eyes immediately. So I try to stumble on, but then comes the next neck of the journey.
I forget I'm not alone.
I am the only one at this end, and I have a hard time imagining him being homesick or missing me because I can't see it, and I can't hear it. I don't feel it.
I start to feel like he is to blame. I know it's his job and not him, but partially it is him too, because he did willingly take the job. If he loves me, then how could he abandon me like this? What gives?
And when he comes home I'll have a hard time adjusting to him being around and in my visual space all the time.
It's horrible how things like this bring out the worst egocentric characteristics in me. When did I become this needy person? It's okay to be sad and miss him, but when did all this surface? How the hell did this surprise me? Again?
And where do I go from here?
Hey Sweetheart.
This is more of an infomercial than it is an actual letter, but I thought you might need one.
Looks like I'll be able to come meet you when you get home, due to my surprising sick-leave. I was happy to find out that even though my closest boss was a wee bit pissed off about the operation, my actual boss, i.e. the owner, was very supportive. She was a lot more worried about the whole thing than I have been, and told me not to worry and concentrate on healing well instead. Always nice to hear, and it did help a lot with the guilt I feel about bailing on them in the middle of june/july.
I haven't really been nervous about the actual operation, more happy that something is on its way to get better. Especially since the knee didn't take well to all the squeezing and poking at the doc's yesterday.
I am a bit concerned about how I'll manage to shop for food when I've made my way home again, and you haven't. I'll probably have to brush up on my flirting skills to get "some handsome, noble, strong man to help a maiden in distress with her bananas and spinach!".
A freezer full of Ben&Jerry might help me get over this traumatizing experience. And the sight of you vacuuming might also do the trick. I think the toilet might be looking mighty filthy by then...
And remember those Everlast shorts you lost at that little gamble we made at that last ultimate fighting-event? You bought them to me today. And since I thought shorts that small were ridiculous enough, I decided to go all the way and am now the proud semi-proud surprised amused owner of ridiculously small, ridiculously pink shorts. And I intend to wear them. To the shops, to the bar, to the gym, to whenever we're meeting your friends, parents and/or grandmother.
Just kidding.
Maybe.
"Hello?"
"Hi Honey!"
"Ohmygodhibabe! How are you doin'?"
"I'm fine, thanks. How are the guys?"
"What guys?"
"Good answer. Just checkin'"
Haha, funny, funny! In fact, so funny that your paycheck just bought me strawberry champagne and the june issue of Elle.
All kidding aside, the funniest thing was probably that I had to show my ID at Alko. For me to not be able to buy this bottle of bubbly, I would've had to be 7 years younger than I am!
Although, it might be a better thing to be carded at Alko for suspicions of being max 17, than it would be if they would greet me by name at the door and ask me if I wanted "the same as usual?"
Having the weekend off, I've been doing some sunbathing. And some cleaning. Since it's hot as hell, I had to vacuum in my bikini. Bet you wish you were home now, huh?
And I mopped! For real! No, believe it. Still in a bikini. And I cut away about half the skin on my index finger while mopping. Because around here, we mop the way you're supposed to. With a lot of aggression. But the main reason I'm telling you this is because I have now both vacuumed and mopped (and will probably have to at least vacuum a few more times before you get home), so you better take your shoes off before you come back home or I'm going to go batshit crazy.
As for all of us, me and everyone I've had contact with, we're all doing fine. Juhani called me today though:
"Hi. You know your maid of honor?"
"Yes, I believe I do."
"She sent me email concerning your bridal shower"
"umm.. dude, I'm pretty sure you're not supposed to tell me any of that"
"no, just wait. She sent me email, and I'm not gonna go"
"You're not? Why?"
"because I already planned a bridal shower"
"okay..."
"you and me go out, have lots and lots of beer, and Sami drives us around to all the clubs"
"I'm in!"
I love my maid of honor, Annika to tiny bits and pieces, but I can relate to how Juhani wouldn't want to participate in an all girls evening. He is, still, almost 2 m (or 6 foot 8, if I did my math right) tall, looks like a biker and is the closest equivalent to one I can come up to without him owning an actual motorbike. You all around Europe (go Yurp!) and the US of A would probably get the image right if you think viking. No, I said viking, not that dwarf with the pantyhose' and plaits from Lord of the rings. Come tell me it's not a gay movie... 9 guys in tights and plaits running around looking for jewelry...
To top it off, I'm still a bit surprised that anyone would throw me a bridal shower, or a bachelorette party, as we call them. I know it's kinda a duty for the maid of honor, but I'm still stunned to think all my friends would have the energy to re-arrange their calenders just to show me a good time. And pay actual money for it. I'd settle for all of us sitting on a rock, drinking beer. And it wouldn't surprise me one bit if they'd all decide at some point "screw this crap. Keg party!".
But we do go a long way back with Annika. For the past ten years, I've spent midsummer (which basically means we all get the day off work and get hammered) at her place in Hämeenlinna. With that one exeption a few years back when I was suspected to have salmonella. I didn't, so y'all can touch me now. She, on the other hand, has always spent the 1st of may with me in turku. With that one exception last year, when I was unhappily working.
Which I will be this midsummer too, but even if I get off work at 8 pm, and am at her place at 10pm at the earliest, I'm still gonna party my shorts off.
This sidetracked a little bit, but the main thing is that I still miss you every now and then, and I hope you're still doing fine.
Love You.
Hey sweetheart.
I found out that I just missed you on the computer, but there was nothing I could do, I was driving back from Turku.
This week, especially after you called a few days ago, I've had an easier take on things. instead of being concerned for you all the time I've finally adapted to the "it's just a damn trip"-mode. I've had so much to do that I haven't even had time to miss you that much, but momentarily something happens. I was watching someone rub another someone's bald head on Miami Ink yesterday, and for some odd reason I got to thinking about how I sometimes rub your chin. And I've been thinking about rubbing the stubble on your chin for a day now. Things like that, you know? You start thinking about it and then it sticks to your brain for a while. No harm in that, though.
I got my second bachelor(ette)'s degree yesterday, this time with champagne and strawberries. It was kinda fun and it did, at the very least, mark the day when I don't have to go home and write on the thesis every day. It's at the bookbinder's now and I'll give it in the next time I go to Turku on the 12th of June to get my last cortisone-shot. And while we're discussing the thesis, as you might remember, I decided to call it Homo Academicus. And I think someone should totally buy you a few beers for having a wife who can sneak "homo" into an academic dissertation and get away with it.
I also wrote the degree essay yesterday. It's a bit hard to say how it went, because it is supposed to be max 4 pages long. It's a bit difficult to discuss, in theory and practice, how a Ph.D.-student builds up their research-identity in 4 pages. You really can't explain the duality that follows being employed bu the university while working with their thesis. The difficulty of balancing work and social life when they don't have enough time to both teach and work on their research project during one day. The problems that lie with being a teacher to M.Sc.-students, a colleague on one hand to the person that is your supervisor, and being a student on to him/her on the other. How they build up their identity through the thesis since that is what validates them within academia and science is also a bit hard to pinch down to 4 pages. I didn't even touch the difficulty of qualitative, semi-structured interwievs or epistemic rights, so I really don't know if it went well or not.
But on the bright side, I got a lot of compliments for my red shoes at the ceremony.
And in the evening I was supposed to go for a few beers with Nina, but she had to work late because the chinese affiliates can't send in their financial shit on time, so we went for the biggest cupcakes ever with Joni. And some beer. And then some more beer.
Today I had my nails done (finally, yay!) and then we went to Tuija's younger brother's high school graduation. It was a lot of fun and we discussed our childhood a lot, since there aren't that many events where we all are present nowadays. Everyone has a life of their own now, which is kind of interesting but kind of sad, too. Oddly enough, all the grown-ups who lived in the old neighborhood had a hard time recognizing me. They recognized Tuija and both her brothers, my parents, my sister and brother.... but not me. Apparently a change of hair-color does a lot.
I still didn't see the Indy-movie because noone wants to go with me. I can't understand why! Harrison Ford, people!
A lot has happened and this is only a fraction of what I've been doing, but probably the most important fraction (a manicure is important!), so I hope you're still doing okay and having as much fun as I am.
Love you.
"Hello?"
"Hi Honey, it's me! How've you been doing?"
I was doing just fine actually, a lot better than when you went to Ecuador, I kinda had this lid on everything and I was okay but now that you've called I fell like this coke-bottle of emotions is starting to explode and it's really silyl since I know you'll be okay but I feel like I'm going to panic soon and it's only been about a week and I was fine up until now but now I really miss you and why are you gone and have you eaten it's really nice here it's been warm and the trees all have leaves and everything is really beautiful and I wish you were here to experience it with me althought the midnight sun is a little hard to get used to again since we have about 18 hours of daylight already and I've been cleaning a lot but I haven't done much cooking since you aren't here to eat what I make and we save a lot in food money but I'd really like you to be here to eat my food and I know that sounds silly but so does everything else I'd like to blurt out and have you eaten at all why are you calling by the way are you okay have you been hurt do you miss me at all?
"Oh, hi babe! I'm fine."